Note to Reader: While reading this, your mind will instinctively begin picturing what Bill’s penis looks like. We apologize in advance. I CALL BULLSHIT. If the wearer of one of these “Pure Ecstasy” condoms is supposed to feel some sort of enjoyment or wonderful tingling sensation in their naughty bits whilst making love with their … Continue reading
This is a spiritual successor of sorts to Don’t Worry Ma’am, I’m Not Chasing You A few months ago I was on my way down to the U-Bahn (subway) station and noticed a woman struggling to get a baby carriage (complete with live baby) down the stairs that led underground. Being the gentleman that I … Continue reading
I’m what you might call a “hurried walker”. When I’m out and about, moving from point A to point B, I tend to do so as quickly as possible. While I certainly wouldn’t rank myself very high amongst the world’s great speed walkers, I do feel like I have a comparable intensity to my gait. … Continue reading
Energy. We needz it and we needz it quickly. That’s the reason why coffee chains like Starbucks and Dunkin Donuts are rolling in the dough*. But drinking coffee is for old people. Who wants bad breath, stained teeth, and the pressing urge to defecate in one’s own britches? That’s why companies wised up to the demands of a younger generation who … Continue reading
It’s summer time and with hot weather comes the need to quench one’s thirst with cool, delicious alcoholic beverages. With the over consumption of cool, delicious alcoholic beverages comes the need to settle gentlemanly differences through the the testosterone fueled dance known as the street fight. While such altercations were once highly revered throughout mankind, … Continue reading
Model Husband 